You work hard for his indifference. No one likes desperate, needy, clingy guys, and the bad boy’s appeal lies in the fact that he’s the complete opposite. No matter how hard you try, it’s impossible to crack him, and the challenge just sucks you in. Like an addiction.
His unpredictability keeps you on edge. You jump whenever he texts or calls, because you never know when it’s going to happen. It’s exciting and keeps you on your toes. It’s also kind of annoying because it makes it hard for you to, you know, plan your life
He never makes you a priority. Whether he’s an aspiring lawyer or a high powered financial advisor, he’s always talking about how busy/stressful/high-stakes/all-consuming his job is. Oddly enough, he always seems to have time for after work drinks, after-after-work drinks, moderate drug use and showing up at your house in the middle of the night. But don’t call him – he’s busy at work.
You end up in ridiculous situations you’d never expected. After not hearing from him for a month, he calls you out of the blue to let you know that the reason he bailed on your date was due to dealing with stressful situations and he needed some time alone.
He operates on a completely different schedule. Making plans with him during is pretty much a no-go. This could be because he’s dating other women or because he’s perpetually unemployed and therefore doesn’t understand the concept of keeping normal 9-5 hours. Either way, his invites to hang out usually sound something like this: “I’m going for after work drinks with x, then I think I’m meeting up with some buddies, but I should be in your area around 8 pm and might be able to grab a beer between 8-9pm. I’ll let you know.”
Even his friends know he’s a mess. “He’s an amazing, awesome guy”, you don't ever hear that. Instead, when you ask his friends about him, they reply with vague, backhanded compliments like, “yeah he’s a good guy – despite everything” or “I know all about him – and I still love the dude.”
You’ve been deluded enough to think you can change him. As long as you’re the most fantastic girlfriend he’s ever had, he’ll leave his bad boy ways behind. He’ll finally call when he says he’s going to call! And clean his apartment! And stop getting blackout drunk with his buddies on Thursday nights! All of this is within your grasp. It’s only later that you realize that the only way he’s going to change is if he decides to stop being a bad boy and become a responsible, considerate adult – something that was never in your power, to begin with.